Local Filmmaker Finally Finishes His Progresso Soup Commercial Spoof - March 18, 2004 - cm
Des Moines, IA - After a turbulent eighteen month long creative journey, filmmaker William R. Donaldson finally finished his Progresso Soup commercial spoof, titled the "Fake Progresso Soup Commercial."
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Area Filmmaker Remakes Hong Kong Classic "Mad Monk." - March 17, 2004 : 12pm - cm
Austin, TX - Bob Erickson of "Q Zap Entertainment" announced today that he plans, sometime in the near future, when he has some free time, whenever that is – to remake the Hong Kong comedy classic "Mad Monk." The ambitious US amateur remake is temporarily titled: "Mad Whore."
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Confusion Over Movie Title Leaves Local Filmmaker Irritated - March 17, 2004 : 11am - cm
Juneau, AK - On Monday, Frank Marshall of "Toyoyoyota Entertainment" got a message on his answering machine regarding a potential distribution deal for his movie "Midnight Skateboarder." Frank was overjoyed to hear that someone has finally recognized his hard work. However, he wasn’t happy for long.
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Area Filmmaker Finally Saves Enough Money to Purchase a Camcorder
March 31, 2004 - cm
Topeka, KS - Dirk Oppenheimer, the primary writer, director, producer, editor, and actor of "Dark Blood Entertainment Group," has finally saved up enough money to purchase a camcorder.
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Local Screenwriter Finally Finished a Screenplay. His Mom Loved it. March 30, 2004 - cm
Pittsburgh, PA - After seven arduous years, local screenwriter Chad Edwards of the "Power of Myth Productions" has finally completed his first screenplay, titled - "Tomb of the Brave Souls."
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Filmmaker Announces the Remake of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind March 29, 2004 - cm
Buffalo NY - Tom Singler, of Weak Stomach Productions, announced today that he will remake "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind."
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Plastic Woman's Giant Mouth Consumes Entire Film March 28, 2004 - web
New York, CA - New York's McMuffin Filmworks and Cowface Films, the company that hosts some Horror Film Festival you will never attend, were producing a movie earlier this week when disaster struck. Scream Queen Felzika Rose (partially pictured from Piss Offson's Zombiebomby,) mistook the production-so-far for a cheese knish and swallowed the whole business with her gigantic terrifying toothy maw. Reports are still dripping in that Felzika has slurped down a number of no budget productions in her maddened stampeding consumptive suck-spree. The filmmaking world mourns tonight, as it seems that this insta-classic (we prefer to leave it untitled) amateur movie's goofy collection of gay jokes, floppy boobs, and shitty zombie fx, may now never see the light of day. Mourn with us, won't you?
Red Hot Paradise Lost Property Found Medium Cool March 27, 2004 - web
* the following news brief is based on a true story *
California, CA - While following up on Rob Rod's production progress with the difficult comic book property "Sin City," our reporters have discovered an even more incredible independent movie is in the works. Paradise Lost is finally be adapted for the big screen by none other than up-and-comer Michael Raven. It should available soon at ...
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Yes, You Are Fat, and No, You Could Never Be a Model March 26, 2004 - wnbc
Providence, RI - We insensitive pricks here at FF would like to send a shout out to all the fat ugly chicks of America. No, we don't want to cast you in our movies. No, we don't really want to pay attention to you today. Nor do we care to sustain your diseased ego in any way if we can help it. Get your own god damned life.
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Canadian's Get Unwarranted Murder, again! March 24, 2004 - dts
NORRISTOWN, Pa. - A photographer was charged Wednesday with stabbing a Canadian porn star to death and dumping her body in the woods — a slaying that may have been part of a sexual bondage fantasy, authorities said.
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Garrett Gets Unwarranted Crap, Again! March 22, 2004 - dts
Cyberspace, CA - FF founder and CEO Garrett McGilichristy has found himself in the public eye yet again this week. The public eye of some anonymous intenet stalker bloke that is! ...Who really only posted once in some back alley fforum thread. that your probabably haven't read. As far as we know, at least. soo... maybe we should say Garrett's square in the private eye again. err... in the private spotlight? ummm.
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Someone Neglects to Update This Website March 23, 2004 - dts
Cyber Space Central, MA - For several days in a row now, this website has been breaking newsless. Not that here isn't a massive plethora of fascinating stories to report on! Oh no!
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Somewhere in the World, Someone is Far More Lonely and Wretched and Drunk Than You Are - March 20, 2004 - dts
Portland, OR - And that person may well be me.
More on this story as it develops.
Some Guy Somewhere Is Far More Successful Than You Are - March 19, 2004 - dts
Boston, MA - Some old east coast Italian guy you've never met has just signed with a management company you've never heard of that is based in a state you don't live in.
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